Wash your Wednesday worry away!

You think you’re waiting for help. For someone to tell you what the right thing to do is. Even though, at the back of your mind, you already know what that is. So all you’re really waiting for, is a time when you’re forced to do it.

Sunday story.

I don’t know who I am. I’m not who I thought I was. I’m more. I’m complicated in ways I’ve never realized before. Not happy or sad, but both, and all the shades in between, all the time. I can be afraid of the melting glaciers and still turn up the air conditioning in my room. I can buy cheap jeans  and still feel sorry for exploited garment workers. I can contradict myself. I’m not supposed to be simple. I’m complicated. I’m a mess. I can think a hundred different things at once. I’m one insignificant creature and I’m the center of the universe. My existence has no meaning and my existence is its own meaning. I am therefore I am.

...

What do i do? What SHOULD i do?

Think about it.

You never know the biggest day of your life is going to be the biggest. The days you think are going to be big ones, they’re never as big as you make them out to be in your head. It’s the regular days, the ones that start out normal. Those are the days that end up being the biggest.

Another dose of Whatever Wednesday

If you cannot appreciate me, then at least stop criticizing me.

I just don't know why there are people out there who would hate me without knowing who i am. They don't even try to get to know me before passing judgment on me.

I don't care about what they think of me, really, i am just who i am. If you think for a second that whatever you say about me or do to me is gonna hurt me, believe me, you're not. You don't bear any significance in my life whatsoever, so what makes you think i am gonna even think about what you say about me.

All i can say is... Your opinion of me, doesn't define who I am. 

It's Friday.

"You’ll get over it…”  It’s the clichés that cause the trouble. 

To lose someone you love is to alter your life for ever. You don’t get over it because ‘it” is the person you loved. The pain stops, there are new people, but the gap never loses. 

 How could it? 

The particularness of someone who mattered enough to grieve over is not made anodyne by death. This hole in my heart is in the shape of you and no-one else can fit it. Why would I want them to?

I'm gonna make you Think Thursday.

You don’t know what goes on in anyone’s life but your own. And when you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re not messing with just that part. Unfortunately, you can’t be that precise and selective. When you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re messing with their entire life. Everything…affects everything.

Sometimes, just words are not enough..

I try to talk to you, but I don’t know what to say. I am afraid you don’t want me to say anything so I don’t. But inside of me there are words waiting to come out, and tell you how I feel- like how I miss you and how I love you despite my broken heart. How I need you in my life and especially how much I want you. But those words may forever stay in my heart- locked inside. Sometimes I wonder if there are words locked inside you too… but I’ll never know.  

Whatever Wednesday

I’ll go out there and make my mistakes. I’ll fall down, get hurt, cry, laugh, love, and get back up. I’ll stand on the highest mountaintop and go into the deepest caverns. I’ll roam across the world, visit the moon and swim in outer space. I’ll let my imagination run wild and let my spirit soar. Why? Because when my life flashes before my eyes in those final moments, I want to have something worthwhile to watch, with plenty of love and laughter, good times and bad. I don’t want to regret a thing and I plan not to. Remember, it’s not usually the things you do that you regret, it’s the things you don’t do and leave unsaid. Laugh out loud. Cry in the rain. Love with all your heart and soul. Get hurt. Tell the truth. Go crazy. But never forget that you only get one shot. One shot at this day, one shot at this minute. One shot at this age. One shot at life. So make sure your life is one you will enjoy watching in your final moments.

...

What are we doing?

-_-

Of course i'm gonna care, of course i still get jealous.

Just like when you got jealous when your dear friend hits on me, that's how i am. 

Hm.

People haven't been very nice to me lately.

I don't know what i did to them, but yeah, it's really not very nice.

Hello.

Merry Hari Raya and Happy Aidilfitri all!

Current song obsession.

What I have in me, in the mind is you, (I would die if we were through), what I'm feeling now, what I'm having is you, (I am lost in pain without you)

(So cold, so alone)

All I have is you, it is all that I'm breathing for, all I need is you, (Now I can't make it through)

All the nights I've prayed, mostly sadly untrue, (I am not prepared to be strong), I just can't believe I am losing you, (Not prepared to carry on), (I can see you walk away)

(So cold, so alone)

All I have is you, it is all that I'm breathing for, all I need is you, (Now I can't make it through), I am losing you forever, (I am lost in pain without you), I am leaving ground forever, (Forever, forever)

(These days are foul, destiny is selecting me) (murder these thoughts, life is disconnecting me), (NOOOOOOOO), (Loving is affecting me), (count all the times you were there protecting me)

So cold, (So alone), all I have is you, it is all that I'm breathing for, all I need is you, (Now I can't make it through), I am losing you forever, (I am lost in pain without you), I am leaving ground forever, (forever), all I have is you, (It is all that I'm breathing for), all I need is you, (Now I can't make it through)

It is all that I'm breathing for, (breathing for, breathing for), (breathing for, breathing for, breathing for)

How blissful..

What is a perfect date for me?

I am really not into those movie on the first date, or the carnival, or anything like that.

For me, the perfect first date involves some action, a lot of talking and bonding, and of course just US time.

Lets cut to the chase.

I want my date to start with a quad ride on the beach to an undisclosed place. How about blindfold me on the quad? Gets me excited and my blood will be racing for sure. Hehe

At the undisclosed place, there lies a mat with a picnic basket on it. Yeap, i love picnics, especially by the beach. Please bake me a chocolate fudge cake, and have with you pasta salad. Those are my favourite picnic items. I don't mind sandwiches too.

All these while, just enjoying each other's company and talking. Getting to know each other and just be with each other. Talk until the sun sets.

P/S: I like cuddles.

Can i have a cuddle until the sun comes up??

Mightaswell

"You just have this really shitty way of looking at things, you know? I don’t have that problem. I just look at the dopeness. But you, it’s like you just look at the wackness."

*biting my tongue*

Nope, i shall not say it, tweet it, or blog about it. It shall forever be unspoken words. :))

I appreciate..

Robert Braul, you can never be more right about this.

"Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things."

Well..

... it really doesn't surprise me anymore.

....

She did not know the nature of her loneliness. The only words that named it were: "This is not the world I expected."

*dies*

There are so many things to do before next week.

I haven't spring cleaned my room, so i'm assuming i'm gonna be Cinderella this weekend and clear out ALL the clutter in my room. Yeap, i have to do it, the only time to do it anyway. Haha

Gotta change some notes to smaller notes for those "kids". Gotta pay bills. Gotta buy some new bras. Woahhh, gotta do A LOT of things.

K, i'm at work now. Toorah.