We have something more, than i can explain..

This post is exceptionally for Ryan and Ryan only! If you're not Ryan, do not.. I repeat, DO NOT read it! 

Blah! I'm sure alot of you probably don't care, would ignore the first paragraph and read it anyway! Whatever! 

Anyways.. 

You know Ryan, I don't know what you're so upset about.. I mean, you already know that i have more guy friends than girl friends.. To get jealous about something so trivial is simply foolish and a waste of time! I already told you from the beginning that I'm still in contact with some of my ex boyfriends, including Alex, and you said you were cool with it.. So why are you making a big fuss just because a certain ex boyfriend called me at 3am or 4am in the morning?? 

Ryan, I'm yours.. You can count on that.. I know you love me and I know that you know that i love you too so please, even if you don't trust him, trust me.. 

It's stupid to be jealous or even have the slightest envy feeling towards any of my guy friends just because i pay that certain someone a little bit more attention than the others.. You wanna know why? Because I'm not their type.. I'm ugly and they only go for gorgeous looking girls.. 

Ryan, i don't look like those normal girls, skinny with big eyes, and a hot looking face to go with that hot looking body.. I'm not all that, so you being insecure is very much redundant! 

The one that needs to feel insecure is me.. Ryan, i have competitors, all wanting your attention.. Have you ever ask yourself about how i feel?? 

Let me tell you this..

Whenever we go out, i feel embarrassed, embarrassed FOR you! I know you deserve much better than what you have now.. You deserve so much more than a girl like me.. Let me tell you this, I'M the one who's supposed to feel jealous when you look at other girls.. 

You'll never get it! It's so hard to maintain that standard you set for me.. You want someone confident, someone with self-esteem, someone so sure of what she wants.. I can be all that Ryan, infact i AM all that, that's why you pick me in the first place.. 

But..

I'm still a girl Ryan, i need you to assure me that you love me.. I still need you to tell me that I'm beautiful just the way i am.. I want you to tell me, underneath all that fancy clothes, that hair and that eyeliner, I'm still the person you fall in love with all over again every single day.. 

I love you Ryan, you know i do.. I know you feel it too when i hug you tight at night and when i secretly peck you on the lips while you're sleeping.. Just please Ryan, have a little more faith in me..

You gonna listen to me, like it or not..

Everyone knows that I'm very straightforward and honest about what i feel.. So if you guys don't like the way i say things out or what i write in my blog, all i can suggest to you is..

STOP READING!

I write truths in my blog and sometimes it may be about you, or me.. Sometimes even about a random SHE or HE.. Whoever I'm writing about is none of your business.. WHY? Because, it's MY blog..

I believe in the freedom of speech and you can do the same.. Bitch about me in your blog, i don't care cause it's your rights.. I know the truth hurts, especially if you read about yourself in someone else's online blog but sometimes you just need a fresh perspective about what you did is wrong..

Some of you give me a stupid face, and fucked up attitude after reading my blog, well i won't apologise cause what i did is not wrong..

So if you still choose to read it, by all means.. Just don't get sour when i write something about you.. *smiles*

I'm every women..

Being the species without penis, doesn't make us the weaker gender.. We can be as strong, if not stronger..

I think women nowadays have their own mindset, their own perspective in life and ON life for that matters.. I don't consider myself a feminist but i'd prefer it if us girls get to have a say in everything under the sun, even when it comes to relationship..

These days are not like the olden days where women stay at home, not go to school and please their husbands.. I dare say that the women nowadays are very well educated, some of which are holding high paying jobs with prestigious status.. However, it disgust me how some girls my age or younger, some even older still acts so old-fashioned when it comes to their life happiness..

RESPECT YOURSELF
Say what you want and mean it.. Respect your decision, respect your body and most importantly respect yourself.. If you don't know one else will!

SAY WHAT YOU WANT, AND MEAN IT!
If you don't want to do something, don't do it! Nobody can force you to do something you don't want and that's a fact! When you made up your mind, stick with it! Don't do the opposite of what you want!

RELATIONSHIPS ARE NOT JUST ABOUT SEX
Say no if you're not ready.. Don't do it just for the sake of making your man happy! He claims he'll love you more if you do this favour for him but if he really loves you, he won't get mad when you say no.. There's only one first time, and if you're not ready, you will regret it! If he ask for a blow when you're sick, say no and move on! Some of you will feel guilty when he plays the 'lack of attention' card and that's just demoralizing! If he can't understand the word no and still demands for it, he's not worth it! Don't give in to him, it's his hormones that's throwing the tantrum! The more you give in, the more they'll ask for it!
Don't be stupid girls, seriously! Have some dignity..